A THOUSAND WORDS - Alex Waterhouse-Hayward's blog on pictures, plants, politics and whatever else is on his mind.




 

Remembering My Father
Saturday, June 16, 2018




For Fathers’ Day my Rosemary asked me, “Do you want to go to Nando’s on Sunday?” I of course answered in the affirmative as it is one of my favourite places to eat. My taste buds at my age of 75 are not up to par and the hot food at Nando’s I can actually taste.

But this is not to be. Today Saturday I attempted to open a little plastic bag of rose fertilizer with my teeth.  I broke of a front tooth cap. My dentist Ben Balevi will do wonders on Monday. Until then it will be soup and hot cream of wheat and Jell-O.

While I really do not celebrate Fathers’ Day much I do use the days around it to remember my own father George.

My father was the most talented of the Haywards (he had two brothers and three sisters) but he was born with a flaw that led him to drink.

In my youth between 6 and 8 we lived in a house that had no extra bedroom. So I had a bed in the living room. I could hear the conversations between my parents when my mother would say, “George you have to stop drinking.” He would promise but he never did stop. Finally around 1951 he left the house to live in a pension so that I would grow up without arguments or scenes.

But I remember him when he lived with us. We would lie in bed and we would sing Onward Christian Soldiers and My Bonny Lies Over the Ocean. He would cook candied apples (they were green on the outside!) for me and take me to see war, cowboy and sword fighting films in town on Calle Lavalle. After a couple of films we would have pizza at the Cuartetas on Calle Corrientes and then ice cream sodas at the Roxy. To this day I con conjure his scent that was part Old Smuggler's Whiskey, Player's Navy Cuts, his Harris Tweed jackets and his shaving lotion.

Once he left he would come on weekends to take me to the movies. Sometimes he would arrive drunk while I was playing with my friends Mario and Miguelito. I would be embarrassed. And yet..

My mother would often tell me how it was that she sacrificed herself for me and yet I showered my father with affection.

For many years my mother would say, “Alex you will never understand because you will never be a mother.”

It was only after she died in 1972 that I finally thought of what I should have said, “Mother you will never understand because you will never be a father.”

Of my months of seeing my father in the late 60s in Buenos Aires I seem to have a memory block. I do not remember any of our conversations. But to this day I have a deep affection for the father that I had who was a real father to me.

He was a journalist who worked for the English language Buenos Aires Herald and The Standard. He was offered to be the editor of the Herald by the publisher but my father for reasons that have always been unclear through an ink bottle of the man and was then fired.

As of now I have written 4475 blogs. I believe that if some of them are not bad it is because I inherited from my father. I also cook very well which is something he did very nicely, too.

I have this mysterious connection with Argentine writer Julio Cortázar because he was a buddy of my father’s. I was much too stupid to ever ask him why this was the case.

On my living room mantle I have his mate. I texted Rebecca (she is now 20) that my perfect gift for tomorrow would be to share a mate in my father’s gourd. She has yet to reply but I live in the hope that it will happen.



Cordelia Pentland - In Pirouette to blanch a Troupe
Friday, June 15, 2018




I cannot dance upon my Toes -Emily Dickinson

I cannot dance upon my Toes—
No Man instructed me—
But oftentimes, among my mind,
A Glee possesseth me,

That had I Ballet knowledge—
Would put itself abroad
In Pirouette to blanch a Troupe—
Or lay a Prima, mad,

And though I had no Gown of Gauze—
No Ringlet, to my Hair,
Nor hopped to Audiences—like Birds,
One Claw upon the Air,

Nor tossed my shape in Eider Balls,
Nor rolled on wheels of snow
Till I was out of sight, in sound,
The House encore me so—
Nor any know I know the Art
I mention—easy—Here—


































More Emily Dickinson

 
 Her Grace is not all she has  
To know if any human eyes were near
Linda Melsted - the music of the violin does not emerge alone
The Charm invests her face
A sepal, a petal and a thorn
The Savior must have been a docile Gentleman
T were blessed to have seen
There is no frigate like a book
I pay in satin cash
Emily Dickinson's White Dress & a Hunter of Lost Souls
El vestido blanco - The White Dress
Water makes many beds
 The viola da gamba
 But sequence ravelled out of reach
 A parasol is the umbrella's daughter
 Without the power to die
 Lessons on the piny
Ample make this bed
How happy is the little stone
 Sleep is supposed to be
The shutting of the eye
I dwell in possibility
when Sappho was a living girl
In a library
 A light exists in spring
The lady dare not lift her veil
 I took my power in my hand
 I find my feet have further goals
 I cannot dance upon my toes
The Music of the Violin does not emerge alone
Red Blaze 
He touched me, so I live to know
Rear Window- The Entering Takes Away
Said Death to Passion
 We Wear the Mask That Grins And Lies
It was not death for I stood alone
The Music in the Violin Does Not Emerge Alone
I tend my flowers for thee
Lavinia Norcross Dickinson
Pray gather me anemone! 
Ample make her bed
His caravan of red 
Me-come! My dazzled face  
Develops pearl and weed

But peers beyond her mesh
Surgeons must be very careful
Water is taught by thirst
I could not prove that years had feet
April played her fiddle
A violin in Baize replaced
I think the longest hour
The spirit lasts
http://blog.alexwaterhousehayward.com/2014/03/i-left-them-in-ground-emily-dickinson.html
http://blog.alexwaterhousehayward.com/2014/01/i-felt-my-life-with-both-my-hands.html
http://blog.alexwaterhousehayward.com/2011/03/currer-bell-emily-dickinson-charlotte.html

http://blog.alexwaterhousehayward.com/2011/03/and-zero-at-bone-with-dirks-of-melody.html
http://blog.alexwaterhousehayward.com/2011/05/charm-invests-her-face.html

http://blog.alexwaterhousehayward.com/2011/06/i-could-not-see-to-see.html 
http://blog.alexwaterhousehayward.com/2011/06/blonde-assasin-passes-on.html
http://blog.alexwaterhousehayward.com/2012/12/you-almost-bathed-your-tongue.html




A Desert Fox in My Garden
Thursday, June 14, 2018



Rosa 'James Mason' June 14 2018

English rose hybridizer Peter Beales (he died in 2013) had the botanical temerity of launching into the garden market of 1982 a rose that would only bloom once. There was and still is competition with roses that are remontant (bloom more than once). What made it more unusual is that this rose was a modern Gallica (Gallicas are ancient roses). This was the equivalent of Ford producing in that year (it didn’t) and all-black Model-T.

The rose is called Rosa ‘James Mason’. I have no idea if Mason, the actor was a rosarian (liked and grew roses). But in the article on his eventual internment in Geneva (not far from Charles Chaplin) his family is quoted as saying, “He would have been happier sprinkled on a rose garden.”

Rosa ‘James Mason’ is huge in our Kits garden. It is Rosemary’s favourite rose. She particularly admires the plentiful and golden stamens. For me the rose is an avenue to my past in Buenos Aires, to the year 1951 when my father took me to see The Desert Fox and the next year to see the spy thriller Five Fingers. Years before in Austin, Texas it was Mason’s voice in my Grade 10 English class that lured me into enjoying Edgar Allan Poe in Poe’s poem Annabel Lee.

That a rose, a red rose with golden stamens, can conjure all that, is proof why I am bonkers over roses.  



James Mason's ashes finally laid to rest

By Caroline Davies

12:00AM GMT 25 Nov 2000

THE ashes of James Mason, the actor, were laid to rest by his family yesterday in a tiny Swiss cemetery on the shores of Lake Geneva, 16 years after his death.

James Mason's grandson, James, at his grandfather's grave in Switzerland

It was a simple ceremony but one his daughter Portland, 52, and son Morgan, 45, thought that they might never see. The years since their father's death have been marred by a legal battle, first with their stepmother, Clarissa Kaye, and then, after her death six years ago, with administrators of her estate.

Clarissa bequeathed Mason's estate to a trust and, although his children have not been able to prove who the beneficiaries are, their lawyers believe them to be devotees of Sathya Sai Baba, an Indian guru whose sect, based in an ashram near Bangalore, has a large following.

So acrimonious has been the dispute that for many years Mason's only offspring had no idea where their father's ashes were. Finally, after lawyers traced them to a bank vault in Geneva, they faced another struggle to get them released for burial.

Watching his son, also James, place flowers on the grave yesterday, Morgan, a film producer, said: "My son has never been to the village my father lived in before. Whenever he has asked to visit his grandpa's grave I have had to say 'no' because, until today, he didn't have one. It is a very emotional moment for us."

"It is like a dream," said his sister Portland at the cemetery in the village of Corsier-sur-Vevey, close to the home in Corseaux where their father lived for the last 22 years of his life. "Sometimes I thought it would never happen. And now he is here. It is wonderful. It has been so, so long."

Mason, born in Huddersfield, West Yorks, whose film career spanned 50 years and included Lolita, A Star is Born and North by Northwest, was laid to rest close to the grave of his friend and neighbour, Charlie Chaplin.

The ceremony, attended by Mason's nephew Christopher, as well as the British ambassador Christopher Hulse, was followed by an exhibition in the village of Corseaux celebrating his work. Morgan, married to the singer Belinda Carlisle, arrived late for the ceremony after being delayed by flooding near his home in Nice.

It was after Mason's death from a heart attack, aged 75, that his children found themselves locked into an emotional and seemingly intractable battle with Clarissa, their father's Australian-born second wife. His will left everything to Clarissa, including his home on the lakeside, other properties, drawings, diaries and the royalties from his career.

Mason felt that she had sacrificed everything for him, especially when she abandoned her Hollywood career to support him when he left Hollywood in 1963, and he wanted her to live her last days in comfort.

In a letter dated May 7, 1976, he told his children, both from his first marriage: "It does not mean that I love you any the less than always, and that's the top. I hope you will understand why I have decided to make you, as it were, stand in line."

The children, who challenged the will, understood it to mean that on Clarissa's death they would inherit their father's estate, valued at up to £15 million. But, by the time of her death from cancer Clarissa, who had no children, harboured a "pathological" hatred of the two, according to Mason's friends, even cutting them out of family photographs.

Morgan said: "Clarissa turned to Sai Baba in the last years of her life. When she died the house was filled with photographs of him. I have nothing against Sai Baba. If he is a wonderful religious man then I am prepared to accept that. But what I am not prepared to accept is that he is going to have my father's home, where I grew up with my sister. That doesn't make any sense to me."

One of the three trustees, an Australian woman, is a devotee of Sai Baba, say Mason's family, who met Clarissa in the last years of her life. The Sai Baba organisation has never confirmed or denied that it is the beneficiary.

Mason's children claim that they were forced to track down their father's ashes and then go to court to have the wording of their choice on his tombstone. Morgan said: "Finally we won when the judge said, 'I think the children ought to be allowed to say what they want on their own father's headstone'."

They chose the words: "Never say in grief you are sorry he's gone. Rather, say in thankfulness you are grateful he was here." Portland, who lives in California, said: "They were the words Teddy Kennedy said when he rang me just after father's death. They have stuck in my mind ever since. I think they are beautiful."

The children claim that lawyers for the trust said Clarissa's wishes were for something biblical. Morgan said: "We didn't want anything biblical. He would have thought that was pretentious if we had chosen a religious statement. We just wanted to sum up his temperament, and his attitude, which was 'It was a good life and I am happy that I was here and brought some pleasure to people'.

"He would have been horrified by all this. He would have been horrified to be in a bank vault for all those years. He would have been happier sprinkled on a rose garden. These people have nothing to do with our family. I don't have one suit or one tie from my father. I have an eight-year-old son who doesn't have one piece of memorabilia of his grandfather. Forgetting about the money and property, which of course are very important things, they won't even give us the emotional things.

"I wouldn't be speaking about it publicly if I didn't find it so absolutely bizarre. I don't want my son and my family to go through this forever. But, I also don't want to be foolish and say 'Okay, forget it. Take it'. We have certainly taken all legal courses, and I won't stop doing that. And I don't think my father would want me to stop doing it, much as he hated litigation."




     

Previous Posts
My Photographic Lineage With Lisa

Remembrance - Not

The Potentiality of a Rosebud

The Darkroom & the Glove

Beauty in Fall Decay

A Post-Halloween-Pre-Christmassy-Rant

No Tigers, Clowns or Brass Bands - Backbone a Circ...

Béatrice Larrivé - a Ghost at the Vancouver Playho...

Costumbrismo - Laurence Gough, Mario Vargas Llosa ...

Alex - the Serial Bombmaker



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8/5/12 - 8/12/12

8/12/12 - 8/19/12

8/19/12 - 8/26/12

8/26/12 - 9/2/12

9/2/12 - 9/9/12

9/9/12 - 9/16/12

9/16/12 - 9/23/12

9/23/12 - 9/30/12

9/30/12 - 10/7/12

10/7/12 - 10/14/12

10/14/12 - 10/21/12

10/21/12 - 10/28/12

10/28/12 - 11/4/12

11/4/12 - 11/11/12

11/11/12 - 11/18/12

11/18/12 - 11/25/12

11/25/12 - 12/2/12

12/2/12 - 12/9/12

12/9/12 - 12/16/12

12/16/12 - 12/23/12

12/23/12 - 12/30/12

12/30/12 - 1/6/13

1/6/13 - 1/13/13

1/13/13 - 1/20/13

1/20/13 - 1/27/13

1/27/13 - 2/3/13

2/3/13 - 2/10/13

2/10/13 - 2/17/13

2/17/13 - 2/24/13

2/24/13 - 3/3/13

3/3/13 - 3/10/13

3/10/13 - 3/17/13

3/17/13 - 3/24/13

3/24/13 - 3/31/13

3/31/13 - 4/7/13

4/7/13 - 4/14/13

4/14/13 - 4/21/13

4/21/13 - 4/28/13

4/28/13 - 5/5/13

5/5/13 - 5/12/13

5/12/13 - 5/19/13

5/19/13 - 5/26/13

5/26/13 - 6/2/13

6/2/13 - 6/9/13

6/9/13 - 6/16/13

6/16/13 - 6/23/13

6/23/13 - 6/30/13

6/30/13 - 7/7/13

7/7/13 - 7/14/13

7/14/13 - 7/21/13

7/21/13 - 7/28/13

7/28/13 - 8/4/13

8/4/13 - 8/11/13

8/11/13 - 8/18/13

8/18/13 - 8/25/13

8/25/13 - 9/1/13

9/1/13 - 9/8/13

9/8/13 - 9/15/13

9/15/13 - 9/22/13

9/22/13 - 9/29/13

9/29/13 - 10/6/13

10/6/13 - 10/13/13

10/13/13 - 10/20/13

10/20/13 - 10/27/13

10/27/13 - 11/3/13

11/3/13 - 11/10/13

11/10/13 - 11/17/13

11/17/13 - 11/24/13

11/24/13 - 12/1/13

12/1/13 - 12/8/13

12/8/13 - 12/15/13

12/15/13 - 12/22/13

12/22/13 - 12/29/13

12/29/13 - 1/5/14

1/5/14 - 1/12/14

1/12/14 - 1/19/14

1/19/14 - 1/26/14

1/26/14 - 2/2/14

2/2/14 - 2/9/14

2/9/14 - 2/16/14

2/16/14 - 2/23/14

2/23/14 - 3/2/14

3/2/14 - 3/9/14

3/9/14 - 3/16/14

3/16/14 - 3/23/14

3/23/14 - 3/30/14

3/30/14 - 4/6/14

4/6/14 - 4/13/14

4/13/14 - 4/20/14

4/20/14 - 4/27/14

4/27/14 - 5/4/14

5/4/14 - 5/11/14

5/11/14 - 5/18/14

5/18/14 - 5/25/14

5/25/14 - 6/1/14

6/1/14 - 6/8/14

6/8/14 - 6/15/14

6/15/14 - 6/22/14

6/22/14 - 6/29/14

6/29/14 - 7/6/14

7/6/14 - 7/13/14

7/13/14 - 7/20/14

7/20/14 - 7/27/14

7/27/14 - 8/3/14

8/3/14 - 8/10/14

8/10/14 - 8/17/14

8/17/14 - 8/24/14

8/24/14 - 8/31/14

8/31/14 - 9/7/14

9/7/14 - 9/14/14

9/14/14 - 9/21/14

9/21/14 - 9/28/14

9/28/14 - 10/5/14

10/5/14 - 10/12/14

10/12/14 - 10/19/14

10/19/14 - 10/26/14

10/26/14 - 11/2/14

11/2/14 - 11/9/14

11/9/14 - 11/16/14

11/16/14 - 11/23/14

11/23/14 - 11/30/14

11/30/14 - 12/7/14

12/7/14 - 12/14/14

12/14/14 - 12/21/14

12/21/14 - 12/28/14

12/28/14 - 1/4/15

1/4/15 - 1/11/15

1/11/15 - 1/18/15

1/18/15 - 1/25/15

1/25/15 - 2/1/15

2/1/15 - 2/8/15

2/8/15 - 2/15/15

2/15/15 - 2/22/15

2/22/15 - 3/1/15

3/1/15 - 3/8/15

3/8/15 - 3/15/15

3/15/15 - 3/22/15

3/22/15 - 3/29/15

3/29/15 - 4/5/15

4/5/15 - 4/12/15

4/12/15 - 4/19/15

4/19/15 - 4/26/15

4/26/15 - 5/3/15

5/3/15 - 5/10/15

5/10/15 - 5/17/15

5/17/15 - 5/24/15

5/24/15 - 5/31/15

5/31/15 - 6/7/15

6/7/15 - 6/14/15

6/14/15 - 6/21/15

6/21/15 - 6/28/15

6/28/15 - 7/5/15

7/5/15 - 7/12/15

7/12/15 - 7/19/15

7/19/15 - 7/26/15

7/26/15 - 8/2/15

8/2/15 - 8/9/15

8/9/15 - 8/16/15

8/16/15 - 8/23/15

8/23/15 - 8/30/15

8/30/15 - 9/6/15

9/6/15 - 9/13/15

9/13/15 - 9/20/15

9/20/15 - 9/27/15

9/27/15 - 10/4/15

10/4/15 - 10/11/15

10/18/15 - 10/25/15

10/25/15 - 11/1/15

11/1/15 - 11/8/15

11/8/15 - 11/15/15

11/15/15 - 11/22/15

11/22/15 - 11/29/15

11/29/15 - 12/6/15

12/6/15 - 12/13/15

12/13/15 - 12/20/15

12/20/15 - 12/27/15

12/27/15 - 1/3/16

1/3/16 - 1/10/16

1/10/16 - 1/17/16

1/31/16 - 2/7/16

2/7/16 - 2/14/16

2/14/16 - 2/21/16

2/21/16 - 2/28/16

2/28/16 - 3/6/16

3/6/16 - 3/13/16

3/13/16 - 3/20/16

3/20/16 - 3/27/16

3/27/16 - 4/3/16

4/3/16 - 4/10/16

4/10/16 - 4/17/16

4/17/16 - 4/24/16

4/24/16 - 5/1/16

5/1/16 - 5/8/16

5/8/16 - 5/15/16

5/15/16 - 5/22/16

5/22/16 - 5/29/16

5/29/16 - 6/5/16

6/5/16 - 6/12/16

6/12/16 - 6/19/16

6/19/16 - 6/26/16

6/26/16 - 7/3/16

7/3/16 - 7/10/16

7/10/16 - 7/17/16

7/17/16 - 7/24/16

7/24/16 - 7/31/16

7/31/16 - 8/7/16

8/7/16 - 8/14/16

8/14/16 - 8/21/16

8/21/16 - 8/28/16

8/28/16 - 9/4/16

9/4/16 - 9/11/16

9/11/16 - 9/18/16

9/18/16 - 9/25/16

9/25/16 - 10/2/16

10/2/16 - 10/9/16

10/9/16 - 10/16/16

10/16/16 - 10/23/16

10/23/16 - 10/30/16

10/30/16 - 11/6/16

11/6/16 - 11/13/16

11/13/16 - 11/20/16

11/20/16 - 11/27/16

11/27/16 - 12/4/16

12/4/16 - 12/11/16

12/11/16 - 12/18/16

12/18/16 - 12/25/16

12/25/16 - 1/1/17

1/1/17 - 1/8/17

1/8/17 - 1/15/17

1/15/17 - 1/22/17

1/22/17 - 1/29/17

1/29/17 - 2/5/17

2/5/17 - 2/12/17

2/12/17 - 2/19/17

2/19/17 - 2/26/17

2/26/17 - 3/5/17

3/5/17 - 3/12/17

3/12/17 - 3/19/17

3/19/17 - 3/26/17

3/26/17 - 4/2/17

4/2/17 - 4/9/17

4/9/17 - 4/16/17

4/16/17 - 4/23/17

4/23/17 - 4/30/17

4/30/17 - 5/7/17

5/7/17 - 5/14/17

5/14/17 - 5/21/17

5/21/17 - 5/28/17

5/28/17 - 6/4/17

6/4/17 - 6/11/17

6/11/17 - 6/18/17

6/18/17 - 6/25/17

6/25/17 - 7/2/17

7/2/17 - 7/9/17

7/9/17 - 7/16/17

7/16/17 - 7/23/17

7/23/17 - 7/30/17

7/30/17 - 8/6/17

8/6/17 - 8/13/17

8/13/17 - 8/20/17

8/20/17 - 8/27/17

8/27/17 - 9/3/17

9/3/17 - 9/10/17

9/10/17 - 9/17/17

9/17/17 - 9/24/17

9/24/17 - 10/1/17

10/1/17 - 10/8/17

10/8/17 - 10/15/17

10/15/17 - 10/22/17

10/22/17 - 10/29/17

10/29/17 - 11/5/17

11/5/17 - 11/12/17

11/12/17 - 11/19/17

11/19/17 - 11/26/17

11/26/17 - 12/3/17

12/3/17 - 12/10/17

12/10/17 - 12/17/17

12/17/17 - 12/24/17

12/24/17 - 12/31/17

12/31/17 - 1/7/18

1/7/18 - 1/14/18

1/14/18 - 1/21/18

1/21/18 - 1/28/18

1/28/18 - 2/4/18

2/4/18 - 2/11/18

2/11/18 - 2/18/18

2/18/18 - 2/25/18

2/25/18 - 3/4/18

3/4/18 - 3/11/18

3/11/18 - 3/18/18

3/18/18 - 3/25/18

3/25/18 - 4/1/18

4/1/18 - 4/8/18

4/8/18 - 4/15/18

4/15/18 - 4/22/18

4/22/18 - 4/29/18

4/29/18 - 5/6/18

5/6/18 - 5/13/18

5/13/18 - 5/20/18

5/20/18 - 5/27/18

5/27/18 - 6/3/18

6/3/18 - 6/10/18

6/10/18 - 6/17/18

6/17/18 - 6/24/18

6/24/18 - 7/1/18

7/1/18 - 7/8/18

7/8/18 - 7/15/18

7/15/18 - 7/22/18

7/22/18 - 7/29/18

7/29/18 - 8/5/18

8/5/18 - 8/12/18

8/12/18 - 8/19/18

8/19/18 - 8/26/18

8/26/18 - 9/2/18

9/2/18 - 9/9/18

9/9/18 - 9/16/18

9/16/18 - 9/23/18

9/23/18 - 9/30/18

9/30/18 - 10/7/18

10/7/18 - 10/14/18

10/14/18 - 10/21/18

10/21/18 - 10/28/18

10/28/18 - 11/4/18

11/4/18 - 11/11/18

11/11/18 - 11/18/18