Saturday, November 04, 2023

Rosa 'Margaret Merrill' 4 November 2023

 

When someone you love dies the most often thought question is “Why was it not me? Why did it have to be her?”

That is followed by thoughts on objects that remain that are still around (in existence) when my Rosemary is not. Why is that blender still working?

This happens often when I go to the garden and particularly now in the fall when my roses (formerly our) are giving their last hurrah before they disappear until next year.

Here is Rosa ‘Margaret Merrill’ a rose that Rosemary adored. Why is it blooming even now and reminding me how Rosemary liked her?

The rose has bad black spot and I thought that scanning these with the unsightly leaves is an honest depiction of the rose that is bidding me goodbye.

As the days get colder and greyer I find myself really becoming a crazy cat lady. I talk to Niño and Niña in Spanish and they cuddle up to me like glue all day.

When the sun was out today around 4, I took Niño for his walk. I had been lazy about it. Somehow he remembered the route and he behaved. I felt useful and accompanied.

How was I ever to know that two brother and sister cats would provide me with my needed affection and attention? Am I crazy to think that they are human?

When I told my cardiologist about my situation with the cats he said, “Alex, they are not becoming more human. You are becoming more feline.”

Could he be right?

 

Friday, November 03, 2023

When I turn off the lights and my Niño and Niña get close I immediately note the absence of my Rosemary on her side of the bed. And I think. I do this without forgetting Captain Beefheart’s Ashtray Heart lyrics, “somebody’s had too much to think”.

 

Photograph by Rosemary

The thought tonight was about having sex with Rosemary and the fact (and it has to be a fact) that having been married to her for 52 years, I did brush my teeth more often than the extremely pleasurable act with her.

That thought immediately took me to the many times that Rosemary would place breath mints on my night table. Particularly when I smoked my Cuban Montecristos I knew that any number of brushings would not take away the taste. It was similar when I smoked Balkan Sobranie in my pipe.

Rosemary must have cringed in bed when I kissed her. Luckily I can report that I gave up smoking 203 years ago so Rosemary had some tobacco-free sex with me.

I miss it and every time I brush my teeth I remember. And I also remember that right after we met in mid December 1967 in Mexico City, when we were both teaching at a school that sent us to teach English to executives at American companies, we found ourselves both doing so at Colgate Palmolive.

 

Thursday, November 02, 2023

Microcosmos Quartet - 2 November 2023

György Ligeti - Quartet No. 1 ‘Metamorphoses Nocturnes’ (1953-54)

Erwin Schulhoff - Five Pieces for String Quartet (1923)

Antonín Dvořák - Two Waltzes, Op. 54

Marc Destrubé - violin

Andrea Siradze- violin

Tawnya Popoff - viola

Hannagh Addario-Berry - cello

 

Nothing much was happening in my life on November 2, the Mexican Day of the Dead. My graphic designer friend Graham Walker and I decided to go to a house concert of the Microcosmos Quartet.

We arrived early. We were able to find our seats on the first row. Unlike most Canadians, Walker (a Scotsman) and me (an Argentine) we never sit in the middle of the middle.

Years ago I learned to sit at the front row for ballet and modern dance so I could hear the dancers breathe. This time around we heard plenty (but no breathing).

Both of us were about 4 feet from where violinist Marc Destrubé sat. Walker was enough on the left that he could see (Walker can read music) Destrubé’s sheet music.

From our vantage point we observed all the magical stuff that cellist Hannah Addario-Berry was doing particularly in the György Ligeti String Quartet No.1. I was afraid her strings would break. They didn’t!

What this house concert taught me is that had I heard most of the program on a CD while comfortably sitting in my living room with a mug of strong tea, I would not have enjoyed it.

For this concert it was paramount to watch the musicians play and at close quarters we could see how the sounds were being made.

Marc Destrubé's Microcosmos Quartet shows that he and his group refuse to depend on their pastss laurels ( that Walker and I were present twice for their playing of all(6) Bélla Bartók Quartets.Including . They challenge themselves and us, the audience, to new sounds even if they are from a distant past. In our Vancouver, a city with a poor memory, the past is mostly forgotten.

For the house concert held at the residence of Beth Carter and Bob Baker we were given lots of goodies and wine.

The concert was the first in the series. The others will be held:

Friday November 3, 7:30pm

 

House concert - Mascall/Macfarlane residence, West Vancouver

 

11 seats available

 

 

Saturday November 4, 7:30pm

 

House concert - The Blue House (Matthews residence), Mt. Pleasant, East Vancouver

 

2 seats available

 

 

Sunday November 5, 7:30pm

 

House concert - Gotfrit/Gruben residence, near Vancouver City Hall

 

5 seats available

 

 

György Ligeti - Quartet No. 1 ‘Metamorphoses

 

Nocturnes’ (1953-54)

 

Erwin Schulhoff - Five Pieces for String Quartet (1923)

 

Antonín Dvořák - Two Waltzes, Op. 54

Wednesday, November 01, 2023

 

I never ever thought I would tell anyone that at my age of 81 I am not interested in women, be they draped or undraped. The only woman I want to be with is my Rosemary and she is dead.

But I have a friend who nags me (that reminds me of Rosemary) to photograph her. In some of my more depressed moments I tell her that taking photographs of lovely women like her is boring. She insists and finally gets her way.

 

Thanks to Courtenay I am able to experiment and try new things.

Of late (yesterday October 31) she came over in her Halloween costume and I used two techniques with my Fuji X-E3. I took 55 pictures of which 50 were very good. 

 

 The two techniques: 1. I grossly underexpose the Fuji using the magic f-stop of 7.1 and my only light being the modeling light of my softbox. 2. I use a focusing spotlight with a Venetian blind gobo (a metal disk) while using a1/2 second slow shutter. I move my camera either up to down or left to right (or variations).

 

How can this be so easy? It is, but it is satisfying. I do this in isolation where only Courtenay and I know that it is all worth doing.