Friday, September 21, 2012

M's birthday party

Some twenty, or so, years ago a mysterious woman who went by the name of M (she did not give me more than that) called me up and asked me if I “did birthday parties.”

I had arrived to Vancouver in 1975 vowing to become a highfalutin photographer. I had made a promise to myself that I would never photograph weddings, babies or pornography. It is now 2012 and I have to admit I photographed two weddings. One of them was Joey Shithead’s and the other was Susan Musgrave saying her marriage vows to a convicted bank robber at the Aggazis maximum security prison. Of babies I can only say that I have taken not quite hundreds of rolls of my two granddaughters from just about their beginning. Of the latter, pornography, I have tried very hard to shoot it but in the end my unavoidable and or inherent good taste transforms it all too just sexy, of the tasteful, ugh, kind!


But when M called about my snapping her birthday party I balked. I told my wife about it. Without saying anything Rosemary looked at me with those “we need the money” eyes. I went to M’s house.

There I was told by a bunch of pleasant looking women that what they all had in common is that in youth they had all been Girl Guides and they often had reunions where they chatted, played bridge and munched on Girl Guide cookies.

I felt a bit uncomfortable because there was only one other man present. I took my snaps. I noticed that the girls were getting rowdy and happy. Had someone spiked their punch?

M 7 the girls

Suddenly I was aware that the one man was gone. The girls looked at me and in unison said, “When are you going to take your clothes off?” I stammered something like, “I think there has been a misunderstanding here.” I quickly packed and went home. I did not collect for my services. This is the first time that M’s pictures have seen the light of day.